Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Evolution, My Appendix!

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
         - Pablo Picasso, Spanish Cubist painter (1881 - 1973)

What does Picasso know? The guy used to draw cubes, for God’s sake.

The technology I wished existed is the one which would help a tech-novice like me to understand all the existing technology. Make life simpler, because all this technology is sure not doing that!

Just the other day I was watching this movie about some megalomaniac who had parenting issues or something on those lines. Suddenly, I hear a ringtone to the tune of some Gujarati folk song blaring from a seat, ahead of me. Now I believe there is a very special place for those who sin, called Hell. However, a very special part of this Hell is reserved for those people who talk in theatres during movies. Even worse the man who looked like he might have been a resident of Alibaug didn’t answer the phone.

Instead he clipped on this body-part shaped headset thingie and talked through it, in a grating voice and very disturbing language. I found out later that this is a new liberal technology called Bluetooth, where a phone can transfer data without a wire. If your phone is internet enabled, you can even use it as a modem and use your new ultra mobile PC to connect to the Internet. Is this ridiculous, or what?

Even more ridiculous?  These computers have been made small enough to actually fit in your pockets. Get this: some actually write on these computers with a pen!

Ten years ago, nobody even thought about writing notes on a mini-sized computer. They used something called pencil and paper! These new mini-computers run an operating system called Windows, probably developed by illegal immigrants from Bangladesh or some such place (I hear they have BPO’s in Dharavi). With these mini-computers, students and adults can play video games instead of studying or actually working. If you are a CEO and think a client is taking notes on his little computer, you may be surprised to find out he is playing Snake instead.


I can never forget the day when my family got our first color television set. The whole neighborhood gathered at our working-class house, where we could watch the latest family-oriented shows like Shriman Shrimati. These days they all watch such immoral shows like Desperate Housewives, South Park, and Rakhi ka Swayamvaar. There is even some marketing scam called "high-def TV."

Do you remember the good old days, when home computers could be used for word processing, study, and even communication between family members?

Now, kids use them to download porn and hip-hop music, which leads to the downgrade of our society. They say it will better help students “organize.” I say this is just an excuse to help dumb down our education system. (More?) Whatever happened to the good old assignments? All Engineers are made by assignments and not by Practical or any other sort of experience. (Not even the weed one). Whatever happened to teachers writing the homework assignment on the board? Don’t get me wrong; I like technology. I somehow feel guilty being a part of the dumbing down of India.

But then We Are Like That Only, No?